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@HEARDinLONDON #blog

Writer's pictureHeardinLondon

Our least favourite phrases tell us a lot about ourselves…

Darling soul. I know you have all the reasons in fie world you could give me about why you haven't sat down. How much we still have to do and how no one else would do it... And yet...


How much more do you really have to do? You are a mammal and you need to rest for survival. If you're going to live this life, you are going to need a whole load more rest this lifetime. You may as well start practising now.

 

I know you think you don't have time to stop. But what if slowing down and taking breaks was where you got creative? What if it is here that you find solutions to all the shite that you feel you need to grind through?

 

I know you believe no one else will do this stuff if you don't. And what if no one does? That's not rhetorical. What if no one hoovers? Will you have to deal with judging yourself in your mother's voice? What if no one makes the packed lunches? Will it mean someone else will have to step up, because they have to? What if you don't do the extra hours at work? Will you have to have a conversation with your boss about your contracted hours and your job description?

 

For many of us, rest can feel like a privilege. For the new parents, for those with caring responsibilities for disabled folk and many more; hearing talk of what we could put down when we're maxed out can feel like a personal affront. And. I dare you dabble in the art of “and”. If none of your obligations are going away anytime soon. How is telling yourself that you have to do all of these things aiding you? Is there any way that you could learn to speak to yourself with a bit more compassion? That in itself frees up some more space for more kindness?  More gentleness? More rest? More ease? Because if there's one thing I do know, it's that telling yourself you never have time, all of the time, does not allow you any space for rest.

 

Often, when we catastrophise, we stop at “it would be awful” without looking at the details. And we cannot make informed decisions if we're not looking at the reality of what we're dealing with. I dare you to follow it through. If you didn't do it, what would really happen?

 

The truth is, when we tell ourselves we have no choice, we feel trapped and stressed, and we don't think clearly. And this often causes us to have more things to do. It may be worth journaling on a few questions that you can ask yourself. How can you stop trying to action your way into feeling better? How can you do less? Where are you willing to face the discomfort of dropping your shoulds for the possibility of what could be?

 

I dare you.

 

Let me know how it goes.




A woodland path in the fog.  It is a landscape photograph by empowerment photographer HeardinLondon

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